Pride Weekend 2006 Retrospect

Three years ago this past weekend, a month before my 28th birthday, I took one of the most significant steps of my life and walked into a gay bar in Chicago on Friday of Pride Weekend 2003. That night was the first time I was ever (knowingly) around more than one other gay person at the same time, the first time I ever danced, the first time I ever drank alcohol (a Screwdriver, a Sex on the Beach, and a Long Island Iced Tea that night), and the first time I ever stayed the night at a guy's house (there were a couple other "firsts" for me that night as well, but you get the idea). Unfortunately, I had to leave the next morning for a business trip to Dallas, so I was unable to stay for the parade; however, that night began a new phase of my life that has turned everything upside down (or maybe more accurately, finally put it right-side up). Two months later I came out to my family, and a month after that I moved to Chicago.

So, this weekend was my fourth Pride Weekend in Chicago and third time watching the parade. Here are my top 5 comments about the weekend:

1. Tied for Most Boring Parade Ever (tied with itself on previous years)

• 250 groups and floats. 41 politicians. Approximately 0% originality. About the only entries that were interesting were the ones that used sexual humor, which, while entertaining, is the easiest and least creative form of humor (I plan to do a more extensive post on that topic soon). There are about 3 entrants I look forward to each year. Dykes on Bikes rock (yes, it's true that lesbians scare me but what's not to love about women in leather on loud motorcycles?). I appreciate the Pride Band. And the Chipotle float, because they give out coupons for free burritos. The rest of the entries are either politicians waving for votes, local celebrities waving at people who don't know or care who they are, or drunk and high guys dancing shirtless to club music (I can see that at Hydrate; give me something more interesting at the parade!). And this year Chipotle ran out of coupons before they got to me, so that nearly ruined my day.
• I have noticed a very distinct trend for those who attend pride parades. Year 1 - Totally fun, exhilarating, "freeing"...instead of marginalization, who I am is celebrated. Year 2 - Still fun, but didn't I see that same float last year? Year 3 - Stupid Chicago pride parade is the worst-run parade ever. Why am I back here again? I'll just stay home next year. Year 4 - The realization hits that we're not really here to watch the parade; we just want an excuse to have a drunken outdoor party with our friends. Suddenly it's fun again, but who are all those people in the street waving and holding signs?
  

2. Celebrity over Substance in Grand Marshal Selection

• This year's Grand Marshal was George Takei, the actor who played Mr. Sulu on the original Star Trek TV series. The 69-year-old Takei revealed last October that he is gay and has been in a relationship with his partner Brad Altman for 18 years.
• Now, I have no problem with highlighting gay celebrities, as pointing them out is one part of the overall beneficial picture to society that gay people are helpful and effective members of society. However, I think that the position of Grand Marshal of one of the country's largest pride parades is not the best place to highlight celebrity; rather, it would be so much more appropriate to honor substance. Allow me to explain....
• When did George Takei come out? A mere 9 months ago when he was nearly 70 years old and (significantly) long after coming out would have any potential to damage his acting career (which is essentially over). Similarly, the 2004 Chicago Pride Parade Grand Marshal was former NFL football player Esera Tuaolo, who has been lauded for being in the difficult position of being a gay man in the NFL. But again, when did he come out? After his NFL career was over.
  
• Now, please understand I am not critical of either of these men nor the timing of when they decided to come out publicly. I know from personal experience (as do most gay people) the significance and difficulty of that decision to come out to family and friends, and I can only imagine that doing it as a celebrity in the public eye is exponentially harder.
  
• What I question, though, is whether or not the position of Grand Marshal of the Pride Parade (which carries with it a very definite sense of "honoring" the person) is the appropriate place to promote someone who essentially is just a famous face who happens to be gay. If we are going to give someone such a position of honor, shouldn't we do it for the Harvey Milks of our day, those who (perhaps even without celebrity) have put personal success, comfort, and safety on the line to advance the equality for which this parade supposedly was created to promote? Personally, I would love to see someone sitting in the back of that convertible next year for whom I can stand and applaud in honor rather than just cheer as a groupie.
  

3. Annoying Political Assumptions

• First, this comment is not an attack on Tom Tunney, the picture above notwithstanding. It's just the only picture I took on Sunday that had any sort of political connotation, so I needed a picture to stick on here.
• One thing I get irritated quickly with is political hyperbole. "Republicans want to starve school children." "Democrats would rather see humans die than animals." Statements like those are foolish and unhelpful for healthy political debate. And, I get irritated that, simply because I am gay, it is assumed that I agree with every part of a socially-liberal agenda.
  
• Because I am attracted to men and believe that I should have equal protection under the law, where is the logical connection to that and the idea that I would support abortion on demand or want to remove the troops from Iraq or think we should impeach President Bush? I'm not saying whether or not I do or don't support any of these things, by the way, I'm just asking, where is the flow of logic between these assumptions about me? And yet, people used "my" pride parade to promote all these agendas with a ferocity and jumps of illogic that frustrated me.
  
• What is the justification for using the Gay Pride Parade for promoting all these other political agendas? Isn't one of the major points of our movement the diversity of who we are? Isn't that why the rainbow flag was chosen as our symbol? So why is it assumed and accepted that this supposedly incredibly-diverse movement of gay people somehow has a completely homogenous political agenda in every area of social activism?
  

4. Fun T-Shirt Tradition

• OK, so I started this post off with my complaints, but lest I start to sound bitter and jaded, those things were essentially minor irritations, and overall I ended up having a much more fun time at the parade than I expected at the start. Food, alcohol, and friends combine to make even a rainy day seem sunny (and wow, did it actually get beautiful for a while later in the day!)
• During my first attended Pride Parade in 2004, I noticed how many fun, humorous shirts people were wearing to the parade. So, last year I decided to begin a personal tradition of purchasing a funny t-shirt to wear to the parade each year. The picture above is this year's selection, for which I actually had several straight girls ask me where they could find it (lol)!
  
• And, this is last year's shirt (click on photo for a slightly-larger view)....

5. Exhausted, but worth it

• Dinner on Friday, Roscoes, Talking to Ryan who was visiting from Boston, Hydrate, Dancing, Charlies, more dancing, crashing for a few hours tho interrupted by a middle-of-the-night drama phone call that threatened to derail the weekend (unsuccessful), waking up and wandering around the PrideFest street fair, losing my money and embarrassed when I try to buy a drink and don't have the cash, bailed out by my friend, Kim English performing, dinner at Hooters (didn't see that one coming, did you?), back home and then out to Hydrate again where I saw Brian, Chandra, and Ray, laughing because the busboy from Hooters was at Hydrate, meeting Jojo at Circuit, great music, crashing for a few more hours, up early to buy drinks and an umbrella before the parade, brunch at JP's apartment where I met his chihuahua named "Corona", heading back over to Broadway and watching the parade, drinking my first-ever can of beer (seriously, only had one or two sips of beer before in my life), lunch at Moses' apartment after the parade with Jojo, Arnel, Scott, Alvin, Neil, Rafael, Edwin, Thora, and others; wandering around Halsted, staring at the hot stripper guy who was with his friends at Hydrate, coffee with my friend at Intelligentsia then stumbling home for a nap and to rest sore legs, realizing that my brother's parade party at our apartment was still going strong, seeing our former roommate passed out on the futon so drunk that he pissed himself, resting for a bit longer, out to Crobar for one final night of dancing, feeling fat around all the buff shirtless guys at Crobar but not caring because I had a wonderful weekend and realized again how blessed I am to have the friends I have here in Chicago.
• And now, the recovery....... I'm too young to say I'm getting old, but would someone help me back to bed now?

Happy Pride Weekend and Wonderful Summer to All! Don't miss out on a single opportunity to cherish your friends and family this summer. Things will never be how they are now ever again in your life....don't ever regret that you didn't grab life for all it's worth (or that you didn't grab that cute guy staring at you across the bar)!